Assessment on Independence, really?

On my own now as I step closer and closer to the real world.

I just received a text message from our OJT manager that I have a TWTH schedule. meaning i will only have to go to the office every tuesday, Wednesday and thursday. Good 3 days right?

And then my good friend Stof called, saying she was given an MWF schedule.

I was shocked.

I really had thought that we'll be together during the whole course of OJT but I guess were wrong.
Now I'm having a hard time to figure out how will I survive tuesdays and thursdays on my own?

I dont have problems wwhen it comes to independence i mean , I love being independent it's a cool word for e, but i cannot hide the fact that I am actually scared. haha It's always nice to have a companion.

Now what? no lookbook moments, No Mcdonals moments and going home together. Waa!

But I believe there's nothing more than that to be sad about, I mean there is more to come, who knows I will have new friends there, that kind of stuffs?

Wish me luck this OJT! O-M!

Where are you gonna spend your summer breaks? :)

Most Generous Give Away Evah!

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Why you 'no' know customer service??????????

Disclaimer: I love my school. I love the ambiance it brings to me everyday, the vintage feel inside it, the quality education they offer, the comfortable rooms, the competent professors (well some). I love everything about it except some of the employees.

Lady with the swollen tummy.

Why you making power trip? You think you own the school right? err Bitch please, I have been arguing with her since the world begin. she never fails to give me a ruined afternoon eveytime I beg for my permit. Which I dont have to beg right? since it's my own. I paid for it. But this lady here makes us students feel that she's so superior and all. I remember a time when I was about to take my 4:00 exams, I come by her window 10 minutes before 4 because I know it wouldnt take a minute to get the permit. But upon seeing me approach her way this lady eventually left her window and told me to wait bacuse she'll be going to the comfort room daw. so i waited hoping that she will be considerate this time.

5 minutes..

10 minutes..

30 FUCKING MINUTES!!!!!!

Its 4:30 and I am so damn late for the exam. I wonder what took her long! I beg for the other lady to just give me my permit but she refused and insisted I wait for the swollen tummy lady.

There she walks beautifully SLOWLY in the parking lot. She seems angry pa nga eh, cause the other lady told her that I was in a rush.

Upon sitting on her throne she told me this:

"Hindi ka ba makapag hintay? late ka na pupunta dito tas magamamadali ka pa?! susunod agahan mo!"

Mr. Maintenance.

Production has always been my favorite subject. I dont have any particular angst against Mr. Maintanance its just that at the time we were having production 9/10% he'll be joining in the stress. telling us that were WRONG, we could break anything blah blah. to the point that you just dont want to use the equipment.

But I understand him. the cameras, mic, lights and all in the school are well preserved! kudos!

Prof. Whatever

I would like to apologize for the language but this one is the most hateful person I have met. I was working hard for all my grades particularly this semester BUT this one is just making hula in our grades. If not, he's taking it personally I guess.

I mean i've been noisy YES, but I always recite, comply with the projects, seldom goes late, listens and studies notes, and passed quizzes so I cannot accept the fact that I got 3.00 on midterms and 2.75 on finals which makes me dissapointed for I wasnt able to join the Dean's List because of HIM.

I would like to question it really but I dont want anymore arguements. this whole thing is making me feel bad. Feels like all hardships and sleepless nights are not worth it.

Im not mad at him for giving me low grades, I am mad at the fact that he didn't even teach me well. He did not clearly told us the difference of this and that and bullshit.

Oh well, God Bless.

No Break up is painless.

I wish I had never known you. I was happy before even when you were not there yet. Unlike now, you make me suffer, I know that you didn't mean to have known me. Me too, I wasn't planning on loving you

I think letting you go was the smartest decision I ever made. Even though I loved you so much, I just couldn't deal with the pain. And the times we spent together, holding each other, were the best times of my life. But no matter how much I wanted to keep you in my arms, I couldn't. I couldn't hold on to you, knowing that all you were going to do was hurt me. But right now, even though I still love you, I don't need you anymore. I don't need you to complete me. So I guess what I'm saying is, I'm sad we're over. But I'm glad I've let go

I wish this wasn't goodbye but it has to be, as much as I want to hold on to us I have to let you go because it's not fair for me to hold on when you have already let go

-adaptations.

My mind is wandering. I know I will have the tendency t post junk here on my blog anytime tonight. But how will I cope up?

Dear past stranger, current angry lover, and I still believe you to be my future husband,

I am crying right know as I am scribbling letters on my laptop. I can't help it. It's so much pain I'm feeling right now. I want to tell it to everybody just so I wont feel abandoned at this kind of situation we are going thru. But I know that everybody has problems of their own, everybody has something more valuable to do. And I just lost some valuable someone, It's you.

Let me start by asking you what had gone wrong?

You always know how much I love you, I guess I never fil to remind you that. I always see to it that you are happy, even sacrificing my own just for you.

I know that I am a bit hard headed at times, a little brat and a lot of times I do make you mad. But you alwas know that I try to change it. I try to be more appealing to your attitude standards. I try to change myself, my looks even my attitude. Because i want you to see how important you are to me.

I left some friends, abandoned some really close friends. Started a new life. A life that only the two of us shares. I never had regrets. I am happy.

I gave you almost everything I have. and by everything, I mean all of me...

Still, no regrets. Because I LOVE YOU.

There are several times that I've been hurt. I have tendencies to give up, But I never ever said that I dont love you. I cant say it, nor imagine.

So how come it looks so easy to tell me those hateful words " I dont love you anymore" ?

(cries harder)

I thought that you were just mad, you were not serious but it turns out that I was wrong.

Sudden goodbyes are always hard.

Shall i set you free now? I dont think I can :/
Im so afraid to lose you, you know im weak. you know I'm innocent. You know I cant live without you. you know I love you that much :(

I am so weak and wasted and hurt. I wish you would kiss me and tell me that you do not mean your words. BUT... you chose to ignore. Now I feel like Im really all by myself.

I just want to disappear...

Love,
Me

UNTITLED

I never loved any one else but you...

Its a sad feeling when someone meant the world to you and yet it doesn't matter to them. not even a bit.

Some people are really meant to meet and fall in love with each other but was not meant to end up together.

I am heart broken. My heart breaks and I dont like the feeling. I am holding my own hand, taking care of my own heart. I am so alone T.T I am so wasted and so broke. I am not me anymore. I am pathetic. and i just want to disappear.

I AM WEAK. im not that strong as what i thought i was. I cannot handle the pain. I simply cant.........

Being sad with the right people is better than being happy with the wrong ones.

smooches :*

Dear past stranger, current boyfriend and future husband,

As I am about to go to sleep tonight, I look at my cellphone and found you and your smiling face in my wallpaper. Accidentally, I smiled too.

Guess you never heard me tell you how blessed I am to be your other half. I'm shy, y'know were not that showy to each other, but just to let you knowthough you may not be the most handome guy i've met, the most richest man i could ever imagine, you'll remain as the luckiest man that i had, am and will love :)

I admit that there are times that I tend to be weak and just wanted to give up, leave and forget all there is about us. But you were always there, your mere presence feels like telling me that I shouldn't for we'll be spending the future together. Yes honey, I know we will :)

You had seen me at my worst, my best and my hottest, (arrr) haha! And you appreciate all of it. You never fail to tell me how good I look, I dress and how great I talk and do stuffs. You make me feel as if I am a likable person. You make me feel woman. You make me feel blessed. You make me feel loved.  You make me happy..

I seriously cannot imagine my life without you. I know it's cheesy but I am telling the truth. And the truth does not hurt, it's a preparation for us to be healed. :)

Cliche as it may sound but you are one of the best things that happened to me.

Please dont be tempted of other firls who looks thinner and hotter than me! i'll curse you! haha kidding aside, Let's work on my figure so that our dirty little visions will come to life. hahahahaha! I know, only the two of us can understand this paragraph. lol

Stay with me, I want you to be the witness of my success, shoulder to cry on when i failed, the man I will see waiting for me at the altar someday and eventually be the man of my future kiddos.

i love you honey :) will forever do :)

Love,

Daisy :)